I was always a bigger girl. People always described me as "big boned" or "athletic build". And while I would have been much better suited for the swim & dive team, I spent countless hours in leotards and tights trying to fit my size 8.5 extra wide foot in a special order pointe shoe and wearing several sports bras so my boobs wouldn't distract the judges during a tap routine.
During my dancing and softball glory days I weighed anywhere for 135-155, which is the exact healthy weight range for my body. I didn't like being on the bigger side, but I knew I was working out so I didn't let it get to me. I kept telling myself that the rest of the dance troupe would eventually be a "well rounded" as their I-live-vicariously-through-my-thin-daughter Moms and I would maintain my adult/healthy weight because I'd been doing so for so long.
This theory held true as long as I was in dance, band, softball, whatever - but I quit everything my sophomore of college so I could focus on starting a religious organization. This coupled with discovering alcohol and pizza delivery. I didn't gain a freshmen 15, but I sure as hell gained a sophomore 20 bringing me up to husky 175. I used to lay on my floor and just sob about how I couldn't fit into any of my clothes anymore. While my girl friends would go out and party, I'd sit at home and drown my sorrows in what else than a bowl of ice cream. Like THAT helps....!
The summer between my sophomore year and junior year, I was home working a 9-5 desk job with some ladies who mentioned they were on Weight Watchers. I had no idea what this even was. That night my mom suggested I do some research (my mom has always been very supportive of me at any weight, but does encourage a healthy life style do to the health issues in my family) and join. That night I subscribed and weighed in at almost 180.
Spending most of my summer finding healthy snacks and going to Jazzercise 5-7 days a week, I was back down to 145 in a matter of 2.5 months. I bought my first ever size 8 and even squeezed in a few size 6s! VICTORY!
One of the girls I lived with junior year and also done WW during the summer and had also lost 25-30 pounds and we were determined to keep it off. We would grocery shop and cook together, discuss food labels, and really encourage each other. I was able to keep the weight off that entire year and even into the beginning of the next school year.
By senior year I'd stopped weighing in and counting points but I had a good foundation and had started working out with a few of my roommates - and most of my friends lived in the sophomore dorm, so it was always a good hike to go visit them!
When I moved home after graduation, I got a job working for one of my old Jazzercise buddies at a ladies only gym. While I started eating queso and drinking beer most week nights, I held my weight gain to a slow roll by working out for an hour plus on the days I worked at the gym. When the gym closed however.....
I nearly ballooned to 190 over night. Between the beer, bar food, steroids for my asthma, not exercising, and then not exercising because it was too strenuous, and have been that way for about a year.
Last year I was part of a fitness program at our gym that got me into great shape but even working with a nutritionist I only lost 5 or so pounds over the three months time. My clothes weren't even fitting better. I was very discouraged and basically gave up and for the last six months of my life I've used every excuse from "the wedding" to "grad school" to "Confirmation" to "I like being fat - it's easier"
Then I started looking at pictures of myself (my face is so fat in my wedding pictures it makes me want to cry), learned that both my grandparents deaths were weight and food related, and with a history of diabetes and heart disease in my family - I better do something!
So my friend Sarah invited me back to Weight Watchers and Eric invited me to set some new fitness goals. After two months I'm down 5 lbs (yes this is slow, but lets be honest, most holiday seasons I've gain more than 5, so a loss is a victory in my book!) and have squeezed in to some pants I hadn't been able to wear for a while!
Last night when I got my 5lb sticker at my WW meeting, the facilitator challenged me to think of some goals, rewards and victories for my weight loss! So here are a few that I can think of:
Rewards and Victories:
- celebrate good fitting clothes
- buy new shoes
- buy a fun new CD or movie
- buy a bike skirt
- share victories with Eric, Katie and/or Sarah
- smile when I realize I've chosen not to bored eat
- smile when I choose not to grab a candy at the welcome desk or cookies in the break room
- plan some splurge nights
- sit in the hot tub!
- get a pedicure
- sit in the sauna
- date night with Eric in hot dress (and not have to wear a sweater to cover my flabby arms!)
Goals:
- Finish the Georgia Southern Triathlon in 1:30 (last year was 1:46)
- Finish the Country Music half-marathon without crying
- Run an entire 5k (no walking!)
- Spring of 2011: do a TRI in a bikini suit!!!!!
- Oh, and get back to my goal weight of 145!!!
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